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Angielskie dowcipy / Political

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The Barber

A priest walked into a barber shop in Washington, D.C. After he got his haircut, he asked how much it would be. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the Lord." The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 prayer ... [cały ->]

Strongest Man

The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze on... [cały ->]

Soviet Sausage Joke #1

Capitalism, Socialism, and Communism have a meeting for tea at noon. Capitalism and Communism arrive on time, but Socialism is nowhere to be found. Finally he arrives, out of breath and apologetic. "I'm sorry," says Socialism, "I was standing i... [cały ->]

Saddam and Clinton

Saddam Hussein and Bill Clinton meet up in Baghdad for the first round of talks in a new peace process. When Bill sits down, he notices three buttons on the side of Saddam's chair. They begin talking. After about five minutes Saddam presses the fi... [cały ->]

Run Mr Taliban Song...

Sung to the tune of "Day-O" (The Banana Boat Song) Day-O...oh Day-O, Air force come and they flatten your home Run Mr Taliban, we know where you're hiding, Air force come and they flatten your home Hey USA, USA, USA... Air force come and they... [cały ->]

Resignation From Phone Committee

OPERATOR, WE'VE BEEN DISCONNECTED: Florida State Senator John McKay has resigned from the Senate Regulated Industries Committee, which oversees such monopolies as the phone company, after his wife charged in a divorce proceeding that McKay had been h... [cały ->]

Recount Demanded by New York Mets

RECOUNT DEMANDED BY METS NEW YORK (AP) --The New York Mets announced today that they are going to court to get an additional inning added to the end of Game 5 of the World Series. The batting, pitching, and bench coaches for the Mets held a press... [cały ->]

Razorback Hogs

Bill Clinton got off his helicopter in front of the White House with a baby pig under each arm. The Marine guard snapped to attention, saluted, and said "Nice pigs, Sir!" The President replied "These are not pigs. They are authentic Arkansas Razor... [cały ->]

Picking on Chelsea Clinton

One day, Clinton called the White House interior decorator into the Oval Office. He was very furious and said, "Chelsea is very upset because she thinks she has the ugliest room in the entire White House; I want something done about it immediately... [cały ->]

Penuts! Popcorn!

President Ronald Regan told this joke about Fidel Castro: Castro was addressing a large audience in Cuba, and he began, "They accuse me of intervening in Angola..." and a man going through the audience called out, "Peanuts! Popcorn!" Castro wen... [cały ->]

Osama/Taliban Jokes

Late Nite Jokes heard on T.V. "There is now a $5 million dollar bounty on Osama bin Laden. Which marks the first time in history there has ever been a bounty on a guy's head who wears Bounty on his head." - Jay Leno "We are starting to learn m... [cały ->]

Noah and the Ark

The Lord spoke to Noah and said, "Noah, in six months I am going to make it rain until the whole world is covered with water and all the evil things are destroyed. But, I want to save a few good people and two of every living thing on the planet. I a... [cały ->]

New Treasury Bonds

The U.S. Treasury has just announced that it will sell three new types of bonds: 1. The Al Gore bond, which has no interest. 2. The Monica Lewinsky bond, which has no maturity And... 3. The Bill Clinton Bond, which has no principal.... [cały ->]

Monica & the Genie!

Monica Lewinsky was walking on the beach when she found a lantern washed up on the shore. She started to rub it and out popped a genie. "Oh goodie, now I will get three wishes!", she exclaimed. "No", said the genie, "You have been very bad this ... [cały ->]

Herc, Snow White & Quasie!

Hercules, Snow White and Quasemoto were sitting at a table talking. Hercules says, "I think I'm the strongest man in the world but it hasn't been proven yet." Snow White says "I think I'm the fairest lady in the land but it hasn't been proven ye... [cały ->]

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